Tags
Aaron Sherritt, Andrew Goerge Scott, Australia, Ben Hall, Bushranger, Captain Moonlight, Captain Thunderbolt, Dan Kelly, Dan Morgan, Frank Gardiner, Frederick Wordsworth Ward, Glenrowan, Harry Power, Joe Byrne, John Fuller, Johnny Gilbert, Kate Kelly, Martin Cash, Ned Kelly, Steve Hart
{In previous posts such as Introduction to Archives of Sin we looked at several criminals from New York City. Now we turn our gaze on Australia.}
I am Ned,
or rather,
I was Ned,
Instead,
I am dead,
Minus my head.
Sorry about that. I should know better than to make an attempt at poetry.
My strong suit is INTIMIDATION and understatement laced with a bit of sarcasm.
Of course this auto-poetry calls for a great explanation. Allow me to start in the present.
Wikipedia says things about me that may or may not be true:
“Edward ‘Ned’ Kelly (June 1854/June 1855 – 11 November 1880) was an Australian Bushranger.”
OK, OK. I know I am already breaking up the story; but you Yanks probably have no idea what an Australian Bushranger is.
In the United States you would guess that it may be an Officer of the Law enforcing the rules of the Fish and Game Commission.
Oh drats! Now I have committed a double fault. There are no longer, Fish and Game Commissions in the USA. They are now “Departments of Environmental Conservation.” Ahem, pardon me and all that!
The term Bushrangers originally referred to runaway convicts. In the early years of the British settlement of Australia, Tasmania was what I called “The Isle of Jail.”
British Isles criminals were banished to Tasmania. Some escaped and had the skills necessary to use the Australian bush as a refuge to hide from the authorities.
Then they chose not to stay in Tasmania; they saw new horizons on the main island.
The term “bushranger” changed. It soon referred to anyone who abandoned society to engage in “robbery under arms.” We “supposedly” lived in the bush of Australia and only emerged to rob, pillage and cause consternation to the ruling authorities.
If bushrangers lived in Brittan we would be called “highwaymen.” In American we would be called “road agents” unless we lived in the Old West where they were called “Horse Thieves”, “Stage Coach Hold-up Men”, “Railroad Bandits” or “Bank Robbers.”
Oh yes, throw in “Hornswoggles” from time to time. That may refer to “Rustlers” which I admit to being very good at.
But let’s get back to specifics!
I, Ned Kelly, to some, appear to be a cold-blooded killer. Others consider me to be a folk hero.
The ink-mongers use me. I do not like to be used.
They turned me into a symbol of Irish-Australian resistance. Against who?
Against the Anglo-Australian ruling class is what they say.
More than 2000 of us bushrangers are said to have existed. We besieged the Australian back roads and small towns. Our favorite pastime was holding a group of people hostage while we pillaged.
See how cute they look all tied up nice and neat. That’s me with the red shirt. My brother Dan is dressed all in brown while Byrne looks for coins. That’s pretty boy Hart with the white shirt on.
We were made up of escaped convicts and others not interested in the current version of Australian Society.
Where are my manners? What am I thinking of? I should introduce you to a few of my fellow bushrangers.
I don’t have any of them handy because most of them fell on hard times and died. Gunshot wounds, knives, died in jail or what-not. One or two even repented. Or at least that is what they told the authorities.
So once again I have to refer to Wikipedia who holds their spirits in high regard, or low regard, depending on your viewpoint.
Fine specimens of manhood; every one of them.
However, the count dwindled after my last shootout at Glenrowan.
Ah yes – – – Glenrowan. It rolls off the tongue of current news people as well as it did to the newsmen of the 1880’s. What is Glenrowan?
Come back for the next post and we can talk about that.
The next time I promise to show a picture of me. It .is very, very nice.
NO! That is not me below. That is another one of those ink-mongers that use me. I don’t much care for him.
Laughing out loud at the poem!
Thanks! I thought it may have been too crude so your comment is a relief. And thanks for visiting my blog.
I’m English and I’m a biologist. We love crude jokes 🙂
No, that poem was gold. Fascinating history too. You learn new things every day.
Hi David, I try to pick out a new subject every month. That way I am forced to learn new things also. Thanks for visiting my blog. Take a look at my “about” page for links to my other blogs and my books. Thank you very much for visiting the Birdsalls and Ned Kelly. More to follow on Ned.
And I just read some of your posts. They are very well written and enjoyable.
Sounds good. I look forward to reading it.
Ned, I see that you really get around in pictures! Both stills and movies. Down under you’re up there with Billy the Kid in pix and flicks. http://tinyurl.com/8d68wxm (Google search result on “movie ned kelly”). But nothing beats getting your story straight from the horse’s mouth, so to speak. So thanks for posting yourself. As for Cap’n Waldo, don’t worry about him. I hear he’s run for the hills of far north NY where the loonies there put meat sauce on meat and call it Michigans.
Oi mate, you hafta come’n down and walk Ayers. Enjoy your beechnuts. Easier to eat in Beechnut Gum. Wrappers come off easier Mate.
LOL. The nuts taste nuttin like the gum. But I’ll take your advice to heart. And mouth. Cheers, Mate.
Hey Ned … I guess you know that old scoundrel Dan Morgan, wannabe Robin Hood folk legend from the 1860’s Australian Gold Rush. Thought maybe you’d want to hear about a 1976 movie where a (then very young) Yank named Dennis Hopper (b. 1936 d. 2010) played Morgan. Has real Aboriginal songs and didgeridoo, too. Based on the book MORGAN by Margaret Carnegie. Believe it or not you can catch the whole flick on YouTube. Oh, but then you don’t have YouTube in your era. Oh well. For posterity then: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utYuLCYV8l0 … Even if you already knew all this, one of your readers might be interested in getting a taste of Australian outlaws in living color. When I read your introduction above, I had not heard of you, but you brought Morgan to mind.
There are so many movies, books, blogs on Ned Kelly that I can not recall them all. But you are getting way ahead of my blog. Please be patient.
Cap’n Waldo
So far I don’t know much about Australia beyond Ricky Ponting. But it looks like that could change. Well bowled, sir!
I don’t know much about it either other than what I had to learn when I put this series together. Thanks for visiting. I hope you like the rest of the series. And check out my other blogs (See “about waldo”). Thanks again for visiting.
Do you find this more challenging?
BTB. Great series as is normal for you, Pts IV-I.
Thanks for reading my “BEHOLD ME!” series. I have to beg you to inform me what BTB means.
Hi Wally, Seek and ye shall find! What a hoot, you gave me a good laugh! Love the poem, well done. But to my knowledge Ned died with his head attached – he was shot at Glenrowan! Cockatoo Island is in Sydney Harbour as were the bulk of the convicts. Tassie wasn’t settled until much later – their claim to fame was they swept the island and killed or drove off the cliffs every Aboriginal person existing in Tasmania. Nothing to be proud of … the convict settlement was in Sydney.
Hi Calmkate, Thanks for reading my introductory post on Ned Kelly. Glad you enjoyed it. I hope you read the remainder of the story. It goes on for quite a few posts. Just click on Next Post near the bottom of the page.
Yes, you are indeed correct. Ned did die with his head attached. After he was shot at Glenrowan he was tried and convicted of being a bad boy. He was then hung until dead. What happened to his head is a mystery. The people in charge of the goal where he was buried had to move a bunch of bodies in order to make room for expansion. There were a bunch of boys hanging around and they think that one of them took Ned’s skull; for what reason other than that’s what young boys we will never know. So that is why the missing head.
Once again, thanks for reading my introductory post on Ned and please continue on. I think you will find it entertaining and factual. More bush robbers will be introduced.
Wally
Hi Calm Kate, I made an error. The “Next Post” button is between the post and the comments.