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(The CEO of la France Inc., Phil ,

enters the room

in a greatly affected manner)


(Peter speaks sarcastically)

  My lord!   (Phil answers with equivalent sarcasm)  

Your grace!

Welcome to Motel on the Mountain.  

(They move to the fireplace.

Peter warms himself)

  Ah, that’s better.  

(Eli adds his sarcasm

to the conversation

between Phil and Peter)


I was told you were impressive for a boy of

thirty-two. I’m Eli, who might have been

your mentor.


Queen Eli of the loft

I presume.


All the others here know me.

  I gather you’re disturbed about your sister and her shares of the company.  

Sixteen years ago you

made a contract with us.

It is time its terms were executed.

  I agree.  

Our position comes to this:

that you will either

honor the union

or return the shares.

  That’s clear, concise and well presented. My position… well, frankly, Phil, it’s a mess. Two years ago, Eli and I, for reasons beyond reasonable, gave the subsidiaries to Dick. That makes Richard very powerful. How can I give him your sister also? The man she marries has you for an ally.  

It’s their wedding or the shares are returned.

Those are the terms you made.

  True, but academic, young man. The shares are mine.  

By what law?

  Possession is nine points of the law. That makes it mine. Got that – – – Boy?  

I am the CEO: I am no man’s boy.

  A CEO? Because you put your ass on a rosewood chair – – – behind a rosewood desk?


Sir – – –

and I use that term loosely – – –

this is all bullshit!

  Phil, you haven’t got the feel of this at all, son. Use all your power: when I bellow, bellow back.

I’ll keep that in mind.

  Keep this in mind also. You and I are miniature corporations. A corporation is a human thing; it does what we do, for our reasons. Surely, if we’re civilized, we can avoid a civil suit. We can make an alliance. We have it in our hands.  

I’ve lawyers of my own.

Are you through?

  Think son. You came here for a reason. Aren’t you interested to see if I have an offer?  

Have you an offer?

  Not yet, but I’ll think of one. Oh, by the way… you’re better at this than I thought you’d be.  

I wasn’t sure you’d noticed.


(Phil exits the room and Peter speaks to Dick)

  Well, what shall we hang? The holly or each other?  

Do I have the makings of a CEO?

  A splendid CEO.  

And would you expect me to give up

that opportunity without a fight?

  Of course you’ll fight. I mentored you to.  

I don’t care what you offer Phil.

I don’t care what plans you make.

I’ll have the subsidiaries and

his sisters shares

and your CEO chair.

I’ll not give up one to get the other.

I won’t trade off the shares or the subsidiaries

to that walking zit bag Joe!

No, I will not.


(Dick exits the room

and Joe speaks to Eli)


Did you hear what he called me?


Clearly, dear.

Now, run along.

It’s nearly time for the caterer

to start serving.


I only do what Peter tells me.

  I agree with Eli. Go and eat.  

Did I say something wrong?

I’m always saying

something wrong.


And don’t sulk.


I’m not sulking.


And stand up straight!

How often do I have to

tell you about your posture?


(Joe exits the room

Eli speaks to Jeff)


And that’s to be the CEO?


And I’m to be his

Chief Financial Officer.

Has he told you?

Joe will do nothing,

while I run the company,

that is to say,

he gets to have

an expense account

that I will fund

to keep him busy with sex,

and out of corporate business.


How nice for you.

It’s not as nice as being CEO.


We’ve made you Chief Operations Officer.

Is that so little?


No one ever thinks of the corporation

and mentions Jeff.

Why is that?


Isn’t being COO power enough?


It’s not the power I feel deprived of;

it’s the recognition I miss.

There’s no recognition for me here.

You wouldn’t think I’d want that, would you?

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